What do you exchange for your time?

Many people might be quick to respond to that question with: "money."

Because we do spend a great deal of time working a job, or building a career, in exchange for money. At least, most of us do. But I've been spending a lot of time thinking about that specific question lately, and I personally keep coming back to the idea that I exchange stories and information, for my time. I'm an avid reader, and a lover of music. I like stories. Podcasts. I like deep conversations with any and all who will go there with me. Youtube. Movies. I loved school most of my life, and I have taken many courses, trainings, and classes by choice throughout my adulthood.

I exchange a lot of time with people's stories, and the information they carry, and with continuing my lifelong education. "Forever a student, and a teacher" is one of my favorite sayings: it feels like the correct way for me to pass this lifetime.

Likely, this is not the case for everyone. I know many people don't enjoy spending hours learning about something new, or listening to lectures, and stories (though I do believe we are all social beings and connected, so that thread does exist in us all to some extent). To me, that has pretty consistently felt like a good "use" or exchange of my time.

Many people exchange fitness, or "physical mastery," for their time. Maybe you love the gym and are consistently working toward new fitness or athletic goals. Maybe your an artist and you exchange your time for your creations; giving hours at a time to the paint, clay, sheet music, or any other medium. Maybe you're in a season of life where caregiving for others is the main exchange of time for you, perhaps you even feel like your life is withering away at the blossoming or decaying of someone else.

Of course this is over-generalizing a bit.

We're all multi-faceted and exchange our time for hundreds (if not hundreds of thousands) of different things. And also, for me, it's been kind of fun to digest how I feel I'm alotting my time.

I've recently accepted a new job (which I will likely share more about in the future) and when I was sharing the news with someone close to me , they said, "You always do jobs that have kind of shitty pay, but you like them, and they're helping people." It was said in a tone that delivered admirability, which was nice, but still felt like, "damn." Because I have spent a lot of time in various different jobs that had low pay, and high interpersonal stress & interaction levels. And in a way, I'm coming to realize part of that is because, again, I have a tendency for exchanging time for stories.

My work has always been working closely with people, and therefore, hearing their stories: in higher education it was the on-campus residents that I supervised, in reiki and coaching it's been people who are ready to gain clarity through consciousness, and as a nanny it's been teaching and supervising children. My new job won't be different in that respect, I will be interacting closely with, and learning the stories of, yet another niche population.

To be honest, money has never been a very big motivator for me, which doesn't make life super easy financially (especially during this period of inflation). I've always been willing to exchange my time for less money than many people would; particularly, if it means that time is spent learning from, listening to, or loving on people. I'm not necessarily proud of it, and it doesn't make me a very good business owner, but it's the truth: I will likely always give more time than I get paid for.

Candidly, for the past month or so, I've been in a bit of a confused, stuck, "wtf am I doing with my life," kind of headspace (hence all the ruminating on these questions, apparently).

So let's call that about 35 days worth of not much but being lazy and sad in various cozy places, watching some tv, reading here and there, and lots of scrolling on my phone. Aka a lot of time exchanged for stories. Stories in my mind and camera roll of the six years of time Emma and I spent together (my cat who recently passed away), stories of Phil Knight (the creator of Nike who wrote Shoe Dog, which I read very slowly all month), stories of fiction through multiple Hulu tv shows, and more stories in my mind of how and why I am where I am, and how, why, and when I "should" be where I "should" be.

I mean, we all do it right? That inner monologue of comparison...Or even inner monologue of control?

I keep finding myself wondering if I should care more about money. If I should have a higher price tag on my time. If I should stop giving free coaching sessions, or tarot readings, or spiritual advice to people when they ask.

But the more I think, the more I continue to know that stories, education, and quality time spent with people, is more valuable than any monetary currency. And if people are willing to share their lives and their stories with me, then I can surely spend some time sharing my knowledge with them. Sure, stories won't pay my bills. My education won't put groceries in my fridge, and time spent helping others won't keep my roof over my head; but life is about more than financial flourishing. At least, to me it is.

So I ask you again, what do you exchange for your time? There is no "right" answer. We all value different things and we're all valid, but it's something worth spending some thought on. You may realize you'd like to change your exchange rate, or you may realize that where you're at is exactly where you're meant to be.